My appearance and wardrobe, I understand. I've fallen back into the horrible habit of biting my nails again and I'm extremely bored with my hair, but too indecisive to do anything about that. As for my clothes, 95% of my wardrobe no longer fits me so as you can imagine, it's pretty damn hard to come up with outfits that both make me look and feel good!
Blogging, I'm not so clear on. I was so excited to start blogging again in June after a few months off, but once I started again, I soon ran out of steam and trailed off into nothing again. I sometimes worry that I only push myself to continue blogging for blogging's sake, rather than a true love for it as I used to. For a while, I wanted to turn my blog into a business but never quite managed to make it happen and perhaps this is where my frustrations lie. More likely I push myself away from blogging because my severe lack of energy means I struggle to post when I want to and to the quality I used to be capable of.
In all honesty, I'm just quite fed up of life in general right now. I've been perched precariously on the edge of a cliff for quite some time now, fully aware that I need to make some changes, and in some cases, I even know what I need to change and how to do it, but I'm just too scared to take that leap right now.
What I really need, is a break. A week (or six!!!!!!) away from work, away from my boyfriend, away from all commitments. I need to really focus on my health without distractions. I need room to breathe for a bit. Time to just sit and reflect on exactly what I want. Time to heal myself after months of self loathing which have led to a completely inability to trust myself enough to make decisions that need to be made.
Unfortunately the kind of break and retreat I need is completely unrealistic and just not going to happen right now and so, I need to start looking at alternatives, ways I can slowly heal myself whilst still dealing with the pressures that everyday life brings:
- I've invested in my health. After realising that juice diets just aren't for me and reverting right back into my old terribly unhealthy eating patterns, I've finally gone and bought the Arbonne 30 Days to Healthy Living and Beyond kit instead because I know this is a healthy lifestyle programme that works for me
- I've invested in myself. The amazing Leonie Dawson is holding a MEGA sale on pre-orders of her 2016 product line. There's only a day or so left so hurry if you want to get on board. (This is NOT an affiliate link - although I usually use affiliate links for Leonie's products, she doesn't have one available for this sale, but it's SUCH a good offer I need to share it with you whether I get paid for it or not!!!!)
- I'm reading for personal development. I've recently been reading Louise L. Hay's You Can Heal Your Life because the title really speaks to me right now, as do some of the messages within the book and I'm hoping I finish it inspired to adopt the positive mindset I've been so lacking recently
- I'm making sure I go for a walk in the fresh air everyday. It's insane how much of a difference this makes...!
- I've started taking action in the areas I can. Albeit completely baby steps, I am still progressing. I know I get overwhelmed when I try to do everything at once, so I've listed the things I can change about my life right now into order of the most important and I'm working my way through step one!
Do you have any tips for adding inspiration back into your life?